Suicides are not an issue for individuals; they’re a community problem. That was the message Maura Weir, regional manager of the Cape and Islands Youth Suicide Prevention Project, brought to tri-town parents on Thursday night.

Prompted by school nurse Kim Corazzini and social worker Kerri Dowdall, Weir gave a lecture on teen suicide and prevention at Old Rochester Regional High School.

Although suicides are rare in the tri-town, Weir said they can happen anywhere and caucasians have the highest suicide rates in the country.

“Suicide does not discriminate,” she said.

The school district is in the early stages of assessing at-risk students. It recently administered the Youth Risk Behavior Survey to the junior and senior high classes, minus the ninth grade.

The date will be released at the ORR School Committee's June meeting.

“There are many areas of celebration but there are some areas of concern," said Assistant Superintendent Dr. Elise Frangos.

In the meantime, parents got plenty to chew on with Weir’s discussion on suicide prevention.

She began by dispelling the myth that many teens keep their thoughts or plans for suicide secret.

“Ninety percent of the kids who die by suicide told someone beforehand,” said Weir.

She said the factors that contribute to suicide are biological, psychological and social.

“The social part is so important, but sometimes we forget it,” Weir said.

She urged parents to look for the signs. Teens may tell a friend about their plans or say something in an offhanded way such as: “It doesn’t matter. I won’t be around after Christmas anyway.” Kids will often be suddenly calm after they make a plan to kill themselves.

Rather than leaving a note, something only 30 percent of people do, teens often post their feelings on social media as well as writing or drawing their intentions.

Depressed kids tend to show a decreased interest in social activities. They may sleep too much or too little, and they might have intense anxiety for prolonged periods of time. Suicidal tendencies may also manifest themselves in physical symptoms such as recurring headaches and stomachaches.

Concerning behaviors that last two to three weeks are a red flag, said Weir.

Teenagers need to have at least one trusted adult they talk to, even if that adult isn’t their parent.

Still, parents who are concerned need to speak up and ask their kids questions in a nonjudgmental way. For example, Weir suggested phrasing questions with “what happened when…” not “why are you acting this way.”

Issues can start at home with kids modeling the behaviors they see at home. “Helicopter parenting” is also an issue that has become more prevalent and is playing a factor in kids’ abilities to cope with stress, said Weir.

Parents do need to help their children learn to cope with anxiety and difficult situations, such as ensuring they have unstructured time, working through large tasks to make them more manageable and making sure they get eight to 10 hours of sleep. But coping must focus on equipping the kids to deal with tasks and stress, not doing it for them.

“We’re seeing an increase in kids that don’t know how to fix their own problems. Don’t fix all their problems,” Weir stressed.

It’s also important not to set the bar impossibly high for students. The goal is excellence not perfection.

“Perfectionists kill themselves,” Weir said. “It’s OK to get a ‘B.’ Tell your kids that.”

Resources are available for teens who are depressed and suicidal. The Plymouth County  Suicide Prevention Coalition can help. Chair Paul Gabriele can be reached at plymouthcountypreventssuicide@gmail.com. The state also has information through the Massachusetts Coalition for Suicide Prevention.

Locally, parents and community members will be able to get involved in the Healthy Tri-Town Coalition. More information will be available at the ORR School Committee meeting, June 10 at 6 p.m. in the ORR Junior High media room.